What i suppose to say?

Thank you for bring me alot of joys and laugh in this year..
Even you all did bring me tears too..
But i still love you guys so much..
I swear its true my dear..

i miss the moment when we always hugging each others before..
but i know,i need to grow up..you guys
plus,that day i'm lonely without my bestie.
so,that's why i love to count on you and be spoils with you guys before..

especially with

(Elina,My baby)
谢谢你一路以来的照顾，其实我很爱你..
我还记得你怎样保护我，关心我,和支持我..
依然还没变..我发觉到，我们好像变的很陌生..
可是每当我寂寞的时候，你就会像个天使那样的
保护我，不曾让我受伤和寂寞..
哦，如果我做了什么让你对我有误会
的事情的话，我想向你道歉。
有句话，我真的想要和你讲很久了..
那就是--“其实我没有想你
想像中那样的坏和带着面套又假惺惺的一个人”，，你会相信我吗？



And

(Eyla,My First friend who i called her as Sayang)
Sayang,i know that we did have a serious misunderstanding before,
but we try to settle it together..
And i'm glad that we are friends till now..
even we did not close like before,but i'm happy because i still have that
chance to see you smile and happy..i will still take care and concern about
you like i did before..Nothing you do or happen will make me love you less..
i miss the moment when you called me as "ADIK"..hahaha..
But i will keep it as memory.. :)


and sure got the others too..

(Eyka,Yunk)


and here is the twin in my class..
hahaha,,there is Myeira,My Lovely Dear..

She always scold me if i didn't trow the rubbish in the basket..
(I love you Dear Myeira,I'm sorry if my words are hurting you or if we have any misunderstand between us.. will you forgive me? =])

and the last one is,,
who always i find her when i need someone to talk..
Najwa,My B..

What i suppose or should say about her anymore?
or even write about her..
because i did write alot about her..hurmmm..
Oh ya,Maybe i just can say that,how about your fever? Do you take your medicine?
that's it..hahahhaha..I just love you b..sincerely..hahaha..


p/s= I Really Grateful That I Have A Classmate And Friends Like You Guys..Yes,I Really Do..Actually there still have one of our friends that i really miss about..
HuRmmm,,I Will Tell You Guys Later..


With Love,
..Elyana..

Mampos kau laa Gila!!

this is the first i guess,,i mean
i write my blog in Bm...ermmm..not sure..


MMg nak sakit hati dgn org yg tak pham bahasa cam kau laa..
seriously,aku pun tak tahu apa masalah kau..
entah dosa apa yg aku buat dgn kau pun aku tak tahu..
ermmm...cbe certa ckit bleh tak?
ArrHHH,,mampos kau laa..


kau text aku ckp yg kau sorry laa,janji tak buat lagi laa..
pastu bleh kau nak srh aku tinggalkan kawan2 aku?
MMG KAU GILA!! kau jgn nak srh aku buat cam tuh bleh tak?
ke mmg kau bleh mampos klau kau tak srh aku buat cam tuh arrrkkk???


Dah laa,,malas aku nak layan kau..
and lagi satu,,aku tak tahu apa masalah friend aku yg lagi sowg nie..
Friend laa sgt kan? hari tuh kau sibuk tnya aku dkt ne? aku elok2 jwb je...
pastu skrg,skrg time aku nak cari kau..bleh plak kau layan aku cam T***??
KE KAU ADA APA2 YG TAK PUAS HATI DGN AKU HUH GILA?? aku sabar mmg laa sabar..
tapi jgn buat aku hilang sabar...Selama nie aku sabar je dgn kerenah kau,,
kan senang klau kau ckap dgn aku if ada apa2 yg kau tak puas hati huh? B**I!!!
If fine that you don't want Be my friend..AKU TAK HARAP PUN BY THE WAY...


ermmm...

Message to you B..

Oh,,why you look so sad?
Tears are in your eyes,
come on and talk to me now...

Don't be ashamed to cry,
let me see your through..
Cause I've seen the dark side too..
when the night falls on you,,
and you don't know what to do..
Nothing you confess can make me
love you less...

I'll stand by you,I'll stand by you..
I won't let no body hurt you,,I'll stand by you..

So,if you"re mad get mad,,
Don't hold it all inside..
Come on and talk to me now..
And heyy,,what you got to hide?
I get angry too,,Well I'm alot like you..

When you're standing at the Crossroad..
Don't know which path to choose,,
Let me come along,,Cause even if you're wrong..
I'll stand by you,I'll stand by you..
I won't let anybody hurt you,,I'll stand by you..

Take me in into your darkest hour..
and I'll never desert you,,
I'll stand by you,I'll stand by you..

And when,,when the night are falls on you baby..
You're feeling all alone,You won't be your own,,
I'll stand by you,I'll stand by you,,
I won't let nobody hurt you..

I'll stand by you,I'll stand by you..
Take me in into your darkest hour..
and I'll never desert you,,
I'll stand by you,,ooooohh,
I'll stand by you,I'll stand by you,,
and I'll never desert you,,I'll stand by you...


I'll stand by you,I'll stand by you..
I won't let no body hurt you,,I'll stand by you..





p/s= Maybe some song can remind us to our beloved person..
and sure,we miss them so much..that's why make our tears drop..
Sorry i just don't know how to make you feel better B =(

Party Night

Yeahh,,i just get back home now (from my uncle house)..
yes,I'm tired + hand are killing me so much because of the injured cause by the BBQ Stick..Ermm...

feel like i just want to laying down on my Lovely bed and have a good dream..
But,i feel guilty toward her and B..because i did promise them to go to school today..
and yes,i really want to go either..
I'm stuck in the middle..hurmm...What to do??
if I'm not going to my uncle house,my uncle sure must be get upset..But,if I'm not going to school,,she and B (Najwa) will mad on me...ERmmmm...So,,i try to text her around 3.44 am,tell her that I'm not going to school and asking for her forgiveness because I'm breaking my words..

How surprise am i when Najwa replying my text,,And she just say "Ok" toward me..
Even she just say ok..but the guiltiness in my heart still killing me..ermm..



p/s--->Sorry sayang,because i didn't go to school..and B,,forgive me yeah..
(I love You both So Much <3 )

Appointment for today (12-9-2011)

Me and Daniel went PJ OLD Town,where is the P1 H.Q Office located around 9 am..

this the place I'm talking about..
there is some more..

nice huh..hehehe...

while I'm waiting for the technical service do their job..
so I'm just walking around and snap these C2P picture..hehehe...
after they done their job..Me and Daniel go to Thai Temple because Daniel
want to do some prayer there..

this what I'm talking about..

THE MAIN TEMPLE..

So,after he done his prayer,,then we just back to house because he need go to work..
hehehehe,,feel like I'm just "fly" over to Thailand in 1 day..hehehe..



p/s=Even I'm not Buddhism follower,,but i really can feel peace in my soul when I'm inside the temple..thanks Daniel..<3

Appreciate Her

Maybe you just don't realize how much I'm appreciate you..
yes,,i really do..you the one who's always asking me and "Forcing" me
to school...

"NAJWA FARHANA" <3 yes,,she's the one..haha..my classmate and my lovely friend either.. she will scold me if I'm doing things wrong,mad on me if I'm "Ponteng".. i mean skipping school days (with no reason)..ermm,, reminding me to taking my medicine when I'm sick.. hahaha,,she really take care of me..Of course My other classmate also concern about me too..like eyla,erlina,myiera,amalina,farhana,and ari...But she are the most concern about me,,Thanks B...I love You So Much!! (I love you Guys too)

Me and Her :)

we always sharing Our Secret together..WE shared,We Laugh,WE cry,And WE hugging to
each other..hurmm..i really feel comfortable with her :)
You're One In A Million B ;)

just want to upload it..hehehe..
this watch is belonging to her..but she asked me wear it (on Thursday)and give back her tomorrow (On Friday)..Actually there's only a trick to make sure that i will come to school..because she know that i will "Ponteng" next day..ERmmmm...

p/s= I love you B,thanks for always concern about me..<3

I'm Missing You..

there was a story where did a girl who's name nana staying at her
cousin house when holiday break for 3 month..at first she don't even
have a friends there..and she is quite shy to make a friend with her cousin friends
at that time...and she just closed with her cousin and only talked with her family..
but the ice wall had break when she start to friend with 3 of her cousin friends..
at first she just though that she won't be closed to them but she's wrong..
they spend time and laugh together every single days...they are get crazy,
laugh loudly,riding bike,drinking milo and loitering every evening or even night..

"fatin" the first girl that she making friend with her...

"najwa and farhana"..


Days passes so fast and the holidays are will be end soon..
so,,she need to go back home and ready for school...
but now,she's already graduate her secondary school..
and ready for the STPM next year..ermm...
she really miss and wish to meet her friends again..
but time always stopping her to do so...


To fatin,farhana and najwa...

i remember all the thing that we shared and the
all of promise that we made just you and i..
all the laughter that we shared together friends ♥
i miss the moment where did we riding bike like a crazy,
i miss that where we always hang out together,i miss that where you're gossip
about someone that i don't even knw hahaha..and yeah,,i miss of everything that we
done together before..yes,,i really do...and thank you because being my sincere friends!! i love you so much!!♥

Me and My Dearest Cousin (Rou Ying)

I do not know how to start it..
I woke up from my lovely bed around 12.25 pm because
I need to follow my mom to Hospital Selayang for Medical Check up..
and then straight away to my aunty shop around 4 p.m...
Guess what,,My mom chatting and loitering with my aunty
from 4.30 p.m until 11 p.m..
Gosh!!!! I totally have no idea what the hell that they are talking and chatting about...hurrrrrmmmmmmm........(clueless)... (=~=)

Crazy Huh? I know....hahaha...
So after my aunty shop are closed..My Aunty (Rou Ying Mom) asking me whether that I want to follow her to go to My uncle house ( Rou ying father house)or just want to go home...
So,,At first I want to refuse it because i'm too tired..
But after she say that Rou Ying will be there too,
Hence straight away i nodding my head..
hahahaha...We arrived there around 1.40 am..

After we took our "breakfast " around 2 am...While we are talking about the river After the breakfast,,Suddenly,my uncle ask me and Rou Ying to follow him to the backyard for "fishing"..Because behind my uncle's house,there is have a small river and he claim that got alot of fishes inside the river..ermmm...
It sound crazy to me at first because it already been 3 in the morning..
Gosh,,how could he want us go for fishing?? hurmm...
But i just follow anyway..
Hahaha...(because i'm too bored)..hahaha...

Believe me,it really hard to catch it...
I try to catch it in many ways..
But thank god..Finally i make it..
hahahahaha...Happy-happy!! (~.~)V

But thank god,,Finally I did catch some anyway..hahaha..

Hahahahaha...Can you see it?hahahahahaha....
and here is....

(Our "Kaki")..hahahahaha...


So after we are enough of playing and caught the fishes..we decide to take a break and chatting inside the house...After for awile, Rouying mom decide to go back..and i leave my uncle house around 5 am...So,,my cousin ask me to hang out till the morning at the cafe..so i just follow her wish and here i am,,in the cafe and writing this blog..ermm..guess what,me and my cousin Rou ying didn't sleep for whole day already..hahahaha...

stupid huh...hahahahahaha...




p/s: from shahjee cafe go to ramaas cafe till 11 am..

第一次能和堂妹一起的"Night Out"..it been 1.30 a.m in the morning right now..

奇迹的是，，我们尽然“各”可以喝完两杯水和两份食物...简直太“疯狂”了...哈哈！！

we sing,we laugh,we play in the cafe...
and yes,,,we are waiting too...
(guess what??)......
maybe this will sound stupid,,but actually we are waiting for
"SUNRISE"..hahaha...不要问我为什么，只是觉得我们已经很久没有一起的看日出。

在那一间的工作人员们都开始对我们热情，像朋友的一样对待。　:)
就算店里只剩下我们两个顾客再如何的吵闹，他们也无所谓，反而更加
的我们吵闹。哈哈！

My Holiday!

first week of holiday..i back to kelantan (again)..
but this time is for attending my cousin's wedding..haha...

Wearing Baju Kurung in such a hot places,How would it feel? why don't you think about its huh!! hahaha...

right after my cousin's wedding ends..
we went to thailand for the vacation..
hehe..<3

in my hotel room...

me and my sister...

guess what----> that's how my holiday end..<3
haha!!! <3 (but i really miss the moment alot <3)

Ridiculous!!

在乡下的一个星期的日子里，真的很闷！
不过，也蛮好玩的。令我感的闲的是，乡下没像城市那样的那么多娱乐。吉兰丹嘛，到处都是马来人嘞！
当说到马来人地区，一定是ISLAM的地区啦。
不用说什么娱乐什么的，连SHOPPING都没有嘞！！（是有的，离爷爷家45KM）
气死人了！！！ridiculous!!!

但好玩的是，我第一次能呆在乡下那么久。。哈哈哈！！（幸好没’’GILA’’嘞！！）

Just Stop For A Minute

Baby I know that you love me so much didn’t you..
And believe me, I feel the same as you do.

But what can I do when we keep arguing and hurting each other hearts? It’s so insane! I realize that me and you just like tornado and volcano.

Honestly, your temper JUST BAD as mine because you just SAME as me!
I know we always try to keep working on its and our relationship too for sure,and
I know that sometime I just ignoring your call and your text. I’m sorry, but I need a space for me to breathing. Because your over worried and your ego are making me breathless sometime!

I love you baby, I’m loving you so much! But I guess you need to know that,
"can you just stop being like that for a minute"???

My Happy Sweet 18th Belated Birthday (morning with my BFF)

一直以来，我都是和家人庆祝生日。。
可是，今年是我18岁生日。。
我就和家人说，如果可以的话，
我想和我的朋友们庆祝..

没想到，爸爸应许了！！！
真的开心死人了！！

首先，在我生日早上，我和
我的人生中最好的朋友“咖啡”，
到ＭＩＤＶＡＬＬＥＹ庆祝..
说起来也蛮好笑的，我们是说好１２点
在火车站见面的。。因为她说早上９点的时候，
她要去考车(she are taking driving license)
她还说会考到１２点，考完了过后就直接到
火车站等我。。
所以就说好１２点见。。

然后，我那天很早就起身了。。
我大概8点左右就
起身了。告诉你，"wake up early in the morning
are not my being and attitude"..
哈哈！！
after been taking my shower around 9 am..
i got a text from her saying that the time are change to 12.15..
so,,since that it too early to get ready..
我就开Facebook玩一下。。
但没多久就咖啡打电话给我，，
她说她已经到了，
我就看着时间，，才10点多。。
没可能我迟到，因为明明时间是换去12.15啊，，
没有理由她在10点多就到..
不想再多问和浪费时间的我，只好叫她在那等我一下。。

卦了电话之后的我，就提高速度的去准备。。
因为不想让她一个人等太久(怕会有危险）。。
结果在11.30a.m我就到火车站。。

看到她其实让我感到蛮开心的，本来是蛮生气的。
可是，不知道为什么当看到她就没事了，反而，
觉得很开心。。哈哈！

买了票后我们就到了Mid Valley,
首先，我们去“打鼓”，然后玩“篮球”，再玩“赛车”。。
蛮好笑的。。（玩了过后，我发觉到我的双手还蛮痛嘞！）
哈哈哈哈哈哈！！

毕竟，电影票都买了，我们就到楼下去走走。
老实说，其实我在等着爸爸进钱给我。
本来打算要2点陪吃lunch的。。
可是因为爸爸迟bank in 钱给我。。
害到她又累又饿。。
可是她还假装没事，一直很坚持的陪我
等爸爸进钱。。
看到她这个样子，
心里蛮内疚又很无奈。。
（咖啡，那天让你久等实在是很抱歉）。。

爸爸在2.30 p.m的时候打电话给我，
他说钱终于都进了。。
（终于！！！）

after withdraw money out..
我们就到oh sushi那里吃日本面和饭。。
she really eat alot...hahaha...
so,i drink "atsuken sake" as celebrating that
i'm already 18th years old..hahahahaha!!

after watching watching movie (the room mate)
we goes to Big Apple City to bought 2 pieces of donuts
and pretending it as my "birthday cake" and imagine that
got "candle on the top"..
oh gosh,,this is most touching my heart..
hahaha!!
she singing birthday song to me..
hahahaha..sweet right..<3 i'm lucky because my tears didn't drop infront her.. hahahaha... we did take a last walked for a while.. 时间不早了，我们决定该回家了。 说到这里，就好笑啦。。 我们这两个“傻的”为了等火车竟然等了整整“一个小时”。。 （感受会如何？你说啦！！>.
其实我们并不是赶不及火车，
而是我们要上的火车实在是太满人了！
所以逼不得已，要上另外一轮的火车。。
（气死人了！！！）

可是，就因为等火车等到太无聊，
就唱些儿童歌来解解闷。。
咖啡说的一点也没错，we can be breathless inside there..
and may be like a "sardin" too...hahaha!!! xD

but what touched my heart more is,,
is when my mom reached to pick me up..
she still saying happy birthday to me...
and as a thank her for today,,first time of my life,,i hugging her..
hahahaa...she's totally make my day...i really love her as my best friend!!


其实，我真的很珍惜和很感谢你。。because being my best friend <3..
and always by my side,protecting me,
respect me,stand with my temper or my attitude and always know how's to make my day..
咖啡，谢谢你！！！i love you friend!! <3 with all my heart and sincere...

没娱乐！！

告诉你，如果你是像我一样那么热爱娱乐和"party"的人，
那就千万别到KELANTAN去啦！！（我是被逼的，因为谁叫我妈妈是吉兰丹人）
所以没办法！！


都怪我妈妈，骗我说只是回一两天而已，
哪知，一回就回了“一个星期”嘞！！！
一个星期在乡下的我，我发觉到吉兰丹人的思想真的很保守（老土）。。
那也不能怪他们，因为那里是“乡下人”嘛。。

乡下没像城市那样的那么多娱乐。说到吉兰丹，到处一定都是马来人嘞！
当说到马来人地区，一定是ISLAM的地区啦。不用说什么娱乐什么的，连SHOPPING都没有嘞！！（是有的，但要离家45KM）
气死人了！！！所以，在那么一个的地方
唯一你可以找的“娱乐”就是“食物”。。
虽然会“清谈”了一些，可是还好啦！哈！
那边的糕点，真的蛮好吃下！真的很不错！！
还而且，各种各样又够便宜。。=)

当我们说到便宜，告诉你，
不止食物便宜，连我们会在城市里买的，
无论是用的，穿的在那边，只有半价嘞！
之前是有问过妈妈，为什么，这里的东西
不像我们在城市里的那么昂贵?
妈妈说因为乡下人的薪水没有像城市里的那么多。。

所以，在乡下买的会比城市里买的比较便宜。。
哈哈！！
（在乡下的我，因为没看过那么多的甜品和食物，所以每一天都花钱“狂着”吃）
苯对吧？哈！

到后来，当我今天回到吉隆坡的时候，我算来算去，我大概已经花了“RM350"。。
相信我，全都花在”食物”而已！！神经病！！！
但出奇的是，像我这种“爱娱乐”的人第一次能呆在一个闲闷的乡下那么久。。感觉有点奇怪对吧？？
哈哈哈！！（幸好没’’GILA’’嘞！！）

Happy Your 19th Belated Birthday My Dear....

今天，是2-4-2011..
也就是代表是你的生日。。
不能亲自为你唱生日歌，，
那只好post些生日歌给你。。。
[open your FB messages]

礼物我会迟点给你，因为我现在没有时间要去学校。

[看你的性格，一定会说“不用啦”，
但我已经前几个月前答应了你，我不想放你的飞机，so,我一定要给]

况且，要买给你的那件衣服，我还没找到，，
气死人了！！

so,,

happy birthday to you...
happy birthday to you...
happy birthday to Bee Chea...
happy birthday to you...

姐姐，你又老了一岁噢！！长大了哦，，
要好好照顾自己，知道吗。。。
记得，下课的时候一定要吃，别老是空着
肚子上课。。知道吗！！你只会讲我，
可是你也是一样啊。。。哈哈！ =D

希望你不介意我这迟来得生日祝福。。。
还有，姐姐，我<3你噢！！！哈！

我再也不会，我答应你。

谢谢你的话，，
让我知道了我一直以来我所想不明白的问题。。

原来，我的态度真的吓到你了。。
对不起，我不是有心。。。
改次，我不会如此了。。

我答应你。。。

在你面前再也不会多讲有的没的，
再也不会在你面前吵吵闹闹，
再也不会令你觉得我很烦，
再也不会做出你讨厌的事，
再也不会做出没大没小的事情，
再也不会抱着你，
再也不想要你以为我是为
情所烦的人。
再也不会做出会让
你误会我的事情。。

还有，，，，

根加不会向你“动手”。

我答应你，我再也不会那样了。。

你的话，让我明白，原来我，
真的让你对我有很多的不“喜欢”。。
我承认，我是比较孩子气，
比较喜欢撒娇，应该是因为，
我不和我的家人住在一起的关系吧，
而导致我和每一个学姐们都很爱玩，
很撒娇。

对不起，我错了。其实，在家我很少会和家人
有如此的撒娇，因为，我的家人一整天
由早忙到晚上。弟弟和妹妹们又没和我一起住，
我们都各住各的，一年都才见几次面。

告诉你这一切，是因为要想和你说
为什么我会像个“长不大的孩子”那样。


其实，也很感激你会告诉我这一切，
因为，如果你不说，我也不知道，
然而我一错再错。现在我知道了，
我保证，我不会想以前那样了。


谢谢你，我明白了，我会改的。
因为我，不想你讨厌我，也不想
有一天你会不理我。。


其实，不是没一个人
我都很在乎和关心，
让你觉得我是一个为
情而烦的人，我也无话可说。
可是，我真的不是那样的人，
问我的朋友就知道了。=）


但，我想要你知道的是，
我是在关心和在乎你。。
虽然知道你不许要我的关心和在乎，
但，我说过，在我心目中的你，
是我的朋友，我的姐姐。

你最爱的花-Sakura Nohara!

"Sakura Nohana",以前，你每一次
都会对我说你喜欢"PinkColour的樱花"..

你希望有一天可以到日本去看樱花。
亲爱的，我答应你，总有一天，
我们一定会到那儿去。

以前对你的说过的话我却，
因为工作上的忙和没时间，
通通都没做到。

抱歉，我冷落了你，
因为和爸爸工作的关系，
我根本没得时间离开或放假。
我也知道我再也没像以前那样的陪你，
而导致，
你和我都经常为了这件事而吵架。

亲爱的，我从来都没有忘记过你。
依然还在想念着你。
每一次想到你的时候，
眼泪不知不觉就流下来了。

我会等你回来，然后，
我们一起去日本看你要看
的“Sakura"......

相信我，
我不管别人的sakura有多美，因为在
我眼中的sakura(你)是最美的！=）

我会耐心地等你回来爱我！

这几天，我一直睡不着。
应该是我想念你的关系吧。

为什么，你相信别人都不相信我？
结果，我们就为了小小的误会而闹。

最后，你狠心之下的和我说“分手”了过后就转头走了。
说真的，我没想到你会为了这件事，会和我说分手。
你可知道，当时我忍痛和眼泪看着你和你的
朋友走了。因为不能再忍下心里的痛，
结果我还是哭了。





我回到家后，你的姐姐打电话给我，
说你回了家后，眼睛“红红”好像是刚才有哭过，
问我为什么，我不知道应不应该和你的姐姐说
我们分手的事，想来想去，我还是说了。



当你的姐姐听了过后，没想到，
她也吓坏了，她说他没想到你会那么轻易的
和我说分手。应该是一气之下才会说出来的吧。
我说我不知道，那还是算了，你要和我分手，
我也阻止不了。

“对不起”！，突然间我被这三句字而吓到。
“我知道我妹妹她一直都带给你伤害，心痛，
可是我知道她其实是，也很爱你的”。

说完后，你的姐姐突然间就挂了。
我，真的不知道应该怎么办才好。
真的万万没想到，我们的关系
会走到这个地步。


第二天，你就打电话给我，
说声抱歉，你说你很后悔，
因为那样的对我。还叫我不要离开你。


我就说，，，，，，

亲爱的，和你在一起的日子当中，谢谢你带给我
那么多的快乐和欢笑。虽然有时候的你会
有点火爆以及有点野蛮。但，我从来就没有
讨厌过你，怪过你，甚至想离开你。
可是抱歉，我希望我们暂时还是让
我们的心冷静冷静下来先说吧！
然后我就挂了。。

亲爱的，
我这么的拒绝你不是因为我不爱你了，
我以前就是想不出，我们之间到底缺少了什么。
我还以为是我们每一次吵架是因为
我无法让你满足了什么东西还是我做错了什么。

到后来，我才想明白，我们之间的问题，
根本不是我的错。
而是你，我们会走到这个地步
就是因为你不信任我的关系。

亲爱的，我求你给大家一个空间
让我们去思考和冷静。还有，
如果你是还爱我的话，那就请你
相信我吧！我不叫你对我好一点，
而是，叫你相信我！

我会耐心地等你，
等你觉得我是信得过得人，我们才
说吧。所以，我们目前就只好先分手。
让彼此的心痛随着时间而过吧！而你，
还会爱不爱我，我就不知道。因为，
我只知道，我会等到你会全心的
相信我的一天。因为我的心只有爱你一个人而已！ <3

姐姐，你还记得吗？

你还记得吗？

我以前每天早上，
一定会对你说声的“早安”和
我每一次对你做的"Twinkle Hand"，
你还记得吗？

每一次对着你的时候，，
我一定会想办法来逗逗你开心，
虽然，我不知道，你是否会微着真心的笑容,
但，只要，你不嫌我烦就算了。

有时候看到你独自一个人，
站岗的时候，心中好像藏着很多说不出的事情
而闷闷不乐，我很想安慰你，
但，心想，还是不要烦你好了。

有时候的你，却不知道，我的存在。
其实我，一直在远方的关心你，注意你。
只是，你不知道和看不到而已。

你还记得，我说过，我很喜欢你衣服的味道，
闻起来，感觉上好像很舒服，好像在“家里”的感觉。
所以我，当跟你在一起的时候，感觉上真的很舒服。
有时候的我，不像和你分离，但又很无奈，
因为，要上课的关系，不得不让你走。
我带着不舍的心情，看着你一步一步的走，
你会知道我当时的心情吗？ 不，你却不知道。
因为你，从来都不知道。

我的面具藏住了我的心里一切，所以，一直以来你看不到我的
悲伤和我的烦恼。在你眼中的我，所看到的，只有快乐以及微笑。
其余的，你都看不到。但，我发誓，对待你的心和为你做的一切
全都是真心。

我不知道为什么，那天，却被你看到我的悲哀了，
那时侯的你，不知到该如何是好，其实，
我知道，你要安慰我，但不知如何说起，最后，
你也只好静静的在我旁边的看着我。

虽然，你一句话也没说，但我能深深的感受到，
你的关心。老实说，我也不知道为什么，我会去找你？
当时的我，脑海里只知道想要见你。

我不要隐瞒你关于我的闭密，虽然我知道，如果我说了
你也许会避开我，不会和我做朋友。但，无论如何，
我一定要告诉你。所以我鼓起了很大的勇气
跟你说我有吸烟。能看的出，你听了过后很失望。
我知道，你最讨厌的是“吸烟的人”，所以我，
不能那么自私的不告诉你。因为我，不想隐瞒你
做着你最讨厌的事来做朋友。至少，告诉了你，
让你来做决定，心里舒服一点。

对不起，让你失望了，我知道，我知道我很愚蠢。
但，我也很无奈啊！其实吸烟对我而言，
是唯一我能减轻我的压力，我的烦恼的东西，
我也想离开和脱离它，但，我不能。

算了，还是算了，说那么多，还是没用。
你也不会明白的。但，我也不想失去你那么
好的“姐姐”。你叫我怎么办？我，脑里现在，
真的一片空白了。


自从那天，我们再也没有谈天和一起下课。
也许，应该是我们都在各忙各的。你忙你的STPM,
而我在忙我的SPM..
可是，有时候我却在想
你会不会是在避开我呢？

直到毕业了，我还是没有答案。
也想不出来。想来想去，还是算了。
过去的就让它过去吧。
但无论如何，我的心里还当
你是我的“姐姐”。对，“陈美琪”，
你永远都是我
心目中的好姐姐！！